Black Girl In The City.

Sebastien Tellier // La Ritournelle
May 27, 2009, 8:01 am
Filed under: Music is My Life

I love the journey this video takes you on…

-black girl.

sorry…not an option.
May 26, 2009, 10:39 am
Filed under: Chapter Next, My Work. My Hustle. | Tags: , ,


Graphistolage David”

Music: Drake // Successful

Most in my life can attest to the fact that I’ve never been without a job or hustle. At the best of times I’ve successfully managed both, and at the worst I relied soley upon the inconsistent payout of a hustle to feed my family. The latter, incredibly stressful and nerve wracking if you were accustomed to attaining things the ‘easy’ way in life. In that regard I’m thankful for the experience of having to literally go out and compete and learn the rules of the game as if my life depended on it. I’ve since altered my moves but maintianed some of that mentality. Constantly staying on the move, elusive and unpredictable while applying the rules of knowledge and adaptation in the most unsuspecting ways in order to attain my goals.

The downside of playing in the lions den is that everything is an illusion, and what usually is most likely is not. You learn to think on your feet and stay 100 steps ahead of your own game or else…you lose. Game over. And all the same, even as a female, you’re not permitted to physically show the toll that the hustle has taken on your own soul – lest you be spotted by those waiting to take charge of your position while at your weakest point. Again, you lose. So, I learned that side of life, got what I needed and took what I could take with me to apply to the next phase; in which the ultimate goal would be to do smarter over harder. Needless to say I had to make some serious decisions about who and where I wanted to be in life and at that point I decided take a different road.

What kills me, though, is how some folks can stand to criticize and question what it is you’re doing in terms of achieving your goals. Some friends have told me that they disagree with the time I’m investing to get my degree since I have equivalent business experience. “You could be investing that time in your own business.” My answer is: If you want to play high ball in the big game there are certain rules you must follow; leaving the others left to be broken.

Others have wondered how I am making time to peruse a writing career and full time career; school and a home with babies in it. I offer two words: Strategic Planning. The essence of the grind or ‘success’ if you may manifests as different things to different people. It means a multitude of things to a particular individual. My top isn’t your top and I wish more people understood that principle.

There are times when I’m questioned about my reasons for selecting the particular path I’ve chosen, and I’ve faced the critical opinion of intellectual friends whose purpose is to challenge any perspective I’ve thrown at them (to keep me on my toes:). And when the majority of them question my how in it all and why I believe that my chosen path is aligned with my destiny I always offer the same response:

“Failure is not an option.”

And so what if I’ve got a lot on my plate…it just means that I have to eat twice as fast. Napkin, please?

-black girl.

Flip Flop Wars


The picture above was taken by yours truly from a strategically selected parking space in front of Old Navy in Atlantic Station yesterday. I, among the other early birds lined behind my car single file, thought it would be smart to get there early to take advantage of the event of the year…the highlight of the season…the kickoff of a southern summer…The One Dollar flip flop sale at Old Navy! LOL I have to laugh at myself because I actually woke up on Saturday morning with a tinge of excitement because soon I’d have a pair of flip flops to match every summer ensemble; just as I’d done last year around this time.

I also thought it cute to let my friends know because I care, but mainly because I just like to be the bearer of great news. Some were on it, others responding thanks, while the majority of my male friends replied, “Real Men Don’t Wear Flip Flops.” Yea, whatever.

Lo had forewarned me of the drama that would soon come, she was already in the mix at another store that had opened earlier than mine. “These people are crazy, pushing you over and everything,” she laughed, “Oh brown! I’ll call you back.” I doubted that I would experience the same madness but was sadly mistaken, and it wasn’t long before the mumbling of threatening curse words ensued underneath my breath.

I was tiny and trapped in a mound of scandalous women clawing and flinging arms, willing to do whatever to get that pink size 9. I sported my slick ninja moves on em, looked for other displays in the store that may have the same thing. Low and behold toward the middle back, three more carts of shoes were ready for the taking. I could hear the others catching on to the existence of my new-found oasis, clamoring their way toward the carts I quickly hounded through.

Finally I’d had every color of my heart’s desire except for one…the white flip flop. I spotted a pair in my size sitting lonely on the other side of the cart and reached for them. Out of no where my hand was stunned with the sting from a woman’s massive hand. It took me a second to register this fact: Whoa and YES, this chick really did smack my hand.

“Those are mine,” she said staring at me blankly. Her eyes were almost animalistic and that white pair of flip flops was the only thing on her menu. Question: Did I want to go to war over a pair $1 flip flops, or should I kindly back down and let her way be had? My blood began to boil and it took every thing I had not to smack the $hit out of her for putting her hands on a complete stranger over something so trivial. I’m not sure if I was more stunned than angry but I just stared at her for a few seconds. A glare that warned of my dark side that would turn the entire %&#$@* Old Navy upside down just to prove a point. Nevertheless, I settled with, “Damn, is it that serious? Here sweetie they’re yours.”

Aside from nearly getting trampled by a stampede of color rubber hungry banchees and nearly getting eaten by a crazy witch with an appetite for flip flips, I made out ok with about 20 pair in assorted flavors for the family – and got the hell out of there quick before I changed my mind about that ‘just to a prove a point’ fantasy.

…and who needs white anyway. :-\

-black girl.




This story hits home in a lot of ways and is definitely on my film list for fall. Although I think they should have stuck with the original title “Push”, the lesson still sells itself. Based on the novel written by Sapphire, this film has already captured the Sundance Festival’s Grand Jury, Audience and Special Jury Awards.

About the Movie: Clareece “Precious” Jones is an overweight, illiterate African-American teen in Harlem. Just as she’s about to give birth to her second child, Jones is accepted into an alternative school where a teacher helps her find a new path in her life. Drops this November.

*The book is on Amazon for about $8 bucks.


-black girl.

The fact is…
May 7, 2009, 11:31 am
Filed under: Music is My Life | Tags: , ,

-black girl.

May 3, 2009, 12:40 pm
Filed under: Chapter Next


‘Bad Ass’ | Greg Delman

Music:  Uptown // Drake

Listen, I’ve been totally shucking this blog and it was bugging me up until today. It’s evident that my life is evolving into something else, something different and new…but I’ve really been trying to find a happy medium to keep the dream alive.

When reading back through this project [ Black Girl In The City ] I noticed a trend. When I was super happy, feeling f*** up or needed an outlet to express myself emotionally – my writing was most active. Call it therapy if you will, but somehow I’d managed to record a major evolution of myself in real time without even realizing what I was doing at the time. This blog had become an open platform to really sort my shish out, and to understand the circumstances that competed for my existence. By maintaining anonymity I was able to offer something real and interesting while helping myself heal in the process. Somewhere along the way I thought it was only logical to turn it something else by offering advice among other things, but now I realize that BGITC was never intended for that.

I started this blog because my spiritual self told me to. At a time when I needed something to help me realize who I truly was, and the depth in which my gift could impact and help complete strangers. And it was only when I went back and read the story in its entirely that the chapter had become evident. Over the recent weeks I’d been struggling with figuring out what to do with this blog, and what actions I could take to remain loyal to its cause. In doing so I realized that BGITC represents a chapter where I’d experienced a time of change and accelerated growth. My willingness to listen to that voice gave me what I needed by taking me to greater heights – to a better place in life with a different state of mind. And because of this my frequency in posting has dissipated. Not because I have nothing to say, but because I’m in a place in my life where I don’t necessarily need an outlet such as this to express my feelings at any given moment. I see this as a sign of growth and a testament in how sticking things through can take you “To”.

But before you get to thinking that I’m doing away with BGITC, let me tell you THAT’s NOT HAPPENING! If you’ve been following from day one you know that writing is something I will forever do – its the fabric of who I am. I’m morose closing out an old chapter and beginning the next, and best believe a thirty something year-old chick like me still has a lot say.

Stay tuned for chapter next.

-black girl.