Black Girl In The City.

Ninja, please.
July 2, 2009, 12:48 pm
Filed under: Chapter Next, Ninja PLEASE. | Tags: ,

amberAmber Rose

Music: N*** Please // Jay-Z

Ok, am I losing my mind or is this city crawling with every man but the right one? Please tell me that I am not the only woman in Atlanta strolling by quality far and few between. Like, it seems as though the existence of what we consider to be Good is a fictitious trick never to be solved by anyone. I imagine it to be something like this…

When a Good Man is coming to town, the Good Ladies sniff him out. A woman at the pool stops and turns her nose to the air…Good Man is coming. A young girl in the supermarket pauses in mid reach for the eggs, she feels it in her loins…Good Man is coming. Somewhere on the South Side another woman is leaving the gym. She steps out onto the busy sidewalk but pauses in mid-step, twitching her nostrils toward the passing wind. She must hurry home now…Good Man is on his way.

When the time comes every Good woman around readies herself in hopes of becoming that golden ticket winner. “Yes, Good Man will be here soon,” they sing to themselves as they imagine being wrapped in his arms. Nail Shops and Spas overflow and the hairstylists around the city are getting hella paid. Even retailers love it when Good Man is coming because the boost in sales is monstrous. You probably wonder why she goes out with her friends (just to party) wearing that $300 black dress. That’s because Good Man is in the building and the flocks are rolling out to make the coveted catch. When you head out to places like Atlantic Station or the Highlands on a warm sunny afternoon, and can’t help but wonder about the seemingly odd occurrence of bountiful, beautifully groomed women, it is at that moment you will understand that Good Man must be near. He is the epitome of perfection and the subject of every single (and probably married) woman’s dreams. He is Good Man, the one that every girl readies for when in reality he doesn’t exist, and all the Good women that considered themselves as such where never guilt or blemish free to begin with. The end.

Truth is, even if something is good we tend to examine it intently until we convince ourselves that it (or he) is actually not good. I have an issue with this and it is one of the things that I constantly work on because there are certain things that I just won’t put up with a second or even first time. I can’t speak for anyone else, but when I see the red flags I bail, period. My thought is that the next man will do the same if I am a not a fit for his taste so why should settle for certain things? Its not a secret that my tolerance is low, but while one person wastes valuable time fighting for something that points to nowhere you can find me on the outside, kicking it like Amber in the pic thinking about what moves to make in accordance with the ultimate scheme, lol. Far too many times I’m just not buying it especially since the term Good can be used without any discretion, including my own.

Call me a pessimist but I really don’t think a “Good” man exists. Partly because the definition of the term Good man is so relative and broad it holds no true ground. Anybody can call someone a Good Man, but keep in mind that their perception may be different than yours. Sure then, I know that the person I end up with will have flaws just as I, but the real challenge is deciding which of these to accommodate and which to run from at the first obvious warning. What would you constitute as a red flag and how many times would you let someone raise it before you get the hint that he is not Good for you? I like to use the “Ninja please,” test. If something occurs or is said that provokes a brow lift and a…


Then I’m definitely on guard and taking mental note. Look for some real world examples soon. 🙂

-black girl.


3 Comments so far
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lol i had to laugh at the last part but i agree with not tolerating certain things,i went out with this guy the other day and certain things he was saying was leaving me with this wtf expression but in hindsight i think i was being abit too harsh.I’ve gotta work on this.

But i do believe there is a guy suited for each woman,just gotta keep looking and be less criticising…slowly but’ll find him

Comment by jasmine


Comment by Flash

A deal breaker for me has always been when it appears that he is overly trying to impress me.While getting to know a guy through conversation he may speak on general topics such as family, friends, life experiences, etc. I consider myself to be a good listener so when the same story is told and you seem to switch it up a bit, I notice. I won’t necessarily call him on it right then and there but I have noticed that usually he is changing his story either (in my opinion) to impress me or cover up something. But because I could be wrong I would stick around more often then not it would turn out that the guy was some what of a poser. Meaning he would embelish past experiences to make them seem more then what they really were. An extreme example would be like when guys do a female wrong and then tell the new girl, “Oh shes crazy!” But he doesn’t tend to feel you in on the hell that he put her through. Another way I have learned to pick up on this is when you are around his friends pay close attention to if his friends tend to dismis what he says. Guys have a way of giving suttle hints that they are not believing what you are saying so if your guy is always stretching the truth, more often then not his friends will let it be none.

Comment by Natural_Oasis

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