Black Girl In The City.

no thanks.
April 9, 2009, 12:53 pm
Filed under: The SAGA | Tags: , ,


Juicy Art

If its one thing I’ve learned its to let alone and let be if I know it ain’t for me. When I was younger I was often afraid to say no. Carried it into my adult hood creating some pretty interesting situations turned the best life lessons. Those lessons partnered with maturity make it easier for me to take an objective look with minimal emotion and physical involvement, and in turn decide whether or not to rock based on the stuff that matters. Even then I may go wrong but exchanging old pleasures and habits for more ‘peace’ of mind is enough to keep me turning away from the tainted….

I’ve lived within the same fifty mile radius for more than sixteen years so I’m always bound to run into someone I know or have known. And in the case of “have knowns”, gotta be honest and say that some of them should probably remain that way. I’m a firm believer that certain people and things are behind you for a reason. And despite my desires to keep it movin’ a certain ‘have known’ has been rallying in the sidelines, eager to jump in the game

Oddly enough it was a basketball game. One of the few rival NBA home matches that people make it a point to attend each year. I was bound to run into some knows and have knowns. In the midst of defense shouting and somewhere around third quarter I felt a familiar pair of eyes searing a hole into my brain. I paused, surveying my surroundings – only to see him wide-eyed , all in my grill waiting for the perfect moment to lock gazes. I laughed when I recognized who it was…a “have known” we’ll call Corlin, an old flame and friend.

Back in the day, like 90’s back in the day, Corlin and I kicked it. We started out as great friends who’d been introduced by my work out partner and his best friend. I was in school then trying to work and raise a child also so I didn’t have the time he needed. He didn’t have the patience I needed either so we chilled before officially cutting loose. I could have cared less. I wasn’t even 21 yet.

About five years later we run into each other again, only this time in a grocery store. Lots had changed, I was on my new ish, better ish. And at first I thought it was cool to kick it and catch up over lunch. It was all was good until he kisses my fingers, tells me he’s engaged, but only to confess that he should have married me. Womp, womp, womp. I wasn’t buying it nor the proposal to swing by his place afterwards. A gesture I quickly refused thinking Really, ninja? What do I look like?


I don’t think so.

He was mad disrespectful with the ‘’back to my crib for a quickie’” proposition but more importantly he’d disrespected his bride to be. So I cut him off at the smell of smoke, not even giving him a chance to explain

Now here we are again, five more years later and this guy (of all people) is seated a few rows ahead of me with his wifey and their crew. I grinned, nodded and wiggled a few fingers hello. He draped his left hand over his seat and I could see his wedding band. Our eyes locked before I looked away and excused myself to the bathroom.

After the game ends he and his crew stand up and gather in a circle in the corner of the court. It’s obvious Corlin’s wasted because he’s talking mad shyt to everyone and being a really ostentatious drunk. A few hand clasps and shoulder taps after that the crew and thier ladies assemble single file and begin walking my way to exit.

Corlin pretends to notice me last, speaking to my mom and daughters first, then me. His wife never said hello which I thought was pretty rude, and although she was prettier than I’d imagined her stank ass attitude ruined it all. He watched her take a few steps before whispering into my ear, “Your beauty has always been timeless. Make sure you call me.” Brushed his Vodka scented, Carmex coated lips against my cheek as he drew away. The deed took all but sixty seconds and in an instant they were gone.

Of course I never called him but that didn’t deter Corlin’s efforts. A few months later I’m muddling through friend requests on Facebook – low and behold! I accept and he sends a note: Thanks for finally accepting me. What have you been up to? I gave a one sentencer and he replied with his phone number and instructions to “Call.” No. Siree.

Fast forward to yesterday while I’m working like a diligent little bee. Office phone rings and I unsuspectingly pick it up. You guessed it! His cocky, half grunt half laugh was enough for me to hang up but I just held the phone and listened to him talk. The argument was that I hadn’t given him a chance to be a part of my new life, and he wanted me to be a part of his. All the while I’m thinking to myself, why? Sure and dandy I’m all for friendly gestures but something tells me that he’s got something else up his sleeve; other plans on his mind. That kinda stuff I just don’t need and can’t afford to mess with now…and never.

I probably would have been flattered by his puffery and concealed intentions back in the day but today is different and I know exactly what’s for me. He’d find a way to break the rules to grab my booty anyway.

No. Thanks.

-black girl.


shawty got giffs!
April 1, 2009, 10:52 am
Filed under: Reality Bites. | Tags: , , ,


–>caution – this is a UGK classic – explicit lyrics are a given so play at your own risk!

I’m such a trash reality junkie and admit that I have this crazy, weird thing for
Ray-J’s VH-1 Show. Part of it reminds me of the high-school days, when all of the girls gobbled and fluttered their feathers for the same cock. Senseless BS if you ask me, then again my mindset wasn’t quite high school back then lol. But you get you point…TV imitates life or whatever – it’s entertaining business indeed.

Unlike some other clown coon reality dating shows I’ve seen, the drama is a little bit more live wired on Ray-J’s show. Like…chicks are buggin out for real for real, lol. Maybe they feel there’s something beneficial for the one who wins the heart of the ‘Prize’ (if that’s your kinda thing), and its getting kinda crazy now that he’s down to the last three. Emotions are live wired and I think it really captures a lot about how frikin crazy women can be and how men interpret our actions.

I find devious comfort watching the drama unfold and talking trash to the tube as I remind myself to never. Ever, ever, ever, ever….appear on ANYONE’S. Reality TV Show. I doubt I’d be dropping splits (shawty got giffs!) or manipulating my opponents so they eliminate themselves, but I’m certain one of my Juggernaut moves would forever label me as that chick that could and didn’t give a damn. I’d rather not risk embarrassing those closest to me because I got drunk and decided it would be cool to hang upside from someones stripper pole (on national TV).

But I just wanna know one thing…LOL

Have you been watching the show? Who do you think will be eliminated next week?

-black girl.

Magnum Worthy?
March 21, 2009, 6:25 am
Filed under: Dirty Talk | Tags: , ,


So this topic has come up on more than one occasion amongst my group of girls. Only this time it happened to pop up while in my hair dresser’s chair with no place to go, lol. We all know how ‘beauty shop chat’ can get so you could only imagine how far south the conversation went after the clock had struck ten, the patron started passing and I’d only gotten halfway home to my long silky mane.

I stayed quiet for the most part, absorbing it got wild. They were wild. Soon the topic of the grand almighty MAGNUM condumundo came up.

“I don’t care what you say, I snatch condoms off regardless of what kind they are,” said the shop owner . She was skinny as hell, like a pound or two heavier than my ten year old. I liked her personality though. Ghetto as hell with butterfly wings for eyelashes. You could tell she was a bout it girl. Explicatives left her lips a mile a minute. She was likely to say anything at any given moment. I continued to listen, cringing as Gina gathered strands of my hair to weave cornrows across my head.

“Well he must be wearing a Magnum when he ain’t supposed to. ” Her brother was walking in the door with more Patron and filthy talk to entertain the crew. He couldn’t even get in the door good before jumping in the conversation.

The argument turned into the fact that there are some cats living in a false reality. Whom, maybe in their dreams, feel that their penis is large and packing…hefty enough to be worthy of Magnum brand protection. Now I don’t know what’s so special about this particular condom but I’m convinced that the gold foil packaging has something to do with it. Anything with gold foil says, “Exclusive. The world is yours.” Especially to the unsuspecting fantasy man who assumes he can fit the bill. Ladies get excited when they see the gold foil come out, and I’m sure men appreciate the gleam of excitement in her eyes before it all goes down. But…I and other women feel that some of you are abusing the Magnum Gold Foil Membership. And you know who you are.


-black girl.

Got your List?
March 20, 2009, 6:36 am
Filed under: Inspiration | Tags: , , ,


Hugo & Marie

I’m glad the weather is warming up. Today is the last day of winter. It’s funny, happens like clockwork every year. Spring ushers in new opportunity, and the seeds you spent all winter long planting and prooning over finally begin to sprout and blossom. A couple of new opportunities came in yesterday and I can’t seem to get one project completed before I am offered the next. Taking Bobby’s advice and not biting off more than I can pen has been my main strategy. Doing so has propelled me into an area of life where balance is key. And being a balanced person is harder than it looks! It’s human nature to gravitate to what makes us feel the best, and while there are other elements around requiring just as much attention, our fondness for that favorite thing keeps us walking on a skewed and unequal path. I admit, I’m a riding crusader for having balance in life despite my not so great gift of being incredibly good at it. Simply because it’s easier said than done.

My search for literary help led me to the bookstore not too long ago. There I found a cool little cheat book to help facilitate good balance in life and understanding where you want to go and be. It’s based on the principal of creating revolving Life Lists. Like a master list of things you want to do with your life. If you looked up list maker in the dictionary, my name would be next to it so excuse me if I’m overly excited about a book about lists, lol. The book offers insight into goals you probably have never thought of but could certainly use in a particular area of your life. Here’s an excerpt from ‘Dream It. List It. Do It!’ by Lia Steakley and


Remember your third grade self? The one thing you really had going for you was unrestricted imagination. When people asked (and they often did), “What do you want to be when you grow up?” you had a ready answer. Sometimes more than one. Back then, your response could change daily-and wildly-from veterinarian to talk show host to astronaut. There were no limits to your imagined future or to the many thing you could be and do.

Somewhere along the line, the focus of our dreams down shifts from what’s imaginable to what’s attainable – from what’s fun to what’s practical, from what’s risky to what’s responsible. Ambitions of playing in the NFL are dulled by playing (and losing) intramural college games, the desire to learn how to fly never gets off the ground, and aspirations to become a painter are put on hold for a job that pays. Life goes on, but not necessarily in the direction you had hoped. Or it goes on so predictably that you forget what it was like to imagine the unimaginable for yourself. You forget how to dream….

Forgetting how to dream is a dangerous place to be. Without imagination we can’t be balanced individuals ready to live out our lives as intended. This book will get your dream juices flowing again, or perhaps give that little push you need to keep dreaming in the right direction. With sections ranging from Living in the Moment to Having Faith, there are hundreds of Life List topics to suit you in your current stage in life. If you haven’t created your own personal list then…do it!

-black girl.

the re-intro.
March 15, 2009, 8:00 am
Filed under: Writer's Log | Tags: , , ,


So, it’s been a minute since I’ve updated but a necessary break I needed to take. Instead of typing a mile long mini-series on where I’ve been and what’s been happening I’ve decided to begin right here. Today and now. I’ll admit I spent a couple of weeks trying to figure out how to jump back into this and a couple more obsessing on what to say once I actually did.

Things have been happening quickly so it’s been quite a task to keep up with myself let alone the blog spot. Narcissistic perfectionism? Probably but I accept that lol. Eventually I picked up on the fact that my personal campaign for over-thinking had gotten me nowhere, literally. So my only logical solution was to get back in here and pick up where I left off, swag turned on of course. 😉

-black girl.

sick wit it.
January 17, 2009, 10:50 am
Filed under: Random Stuff


Tori Alamaze

I AM. EXHAUSTED. And I really can’t say more than that! As a result my blog has been one of the things to suffer since I’m not posting as often, but at least I’m yet holding on, lol.

It’s kinda been one thing after another, not necessarily bad, just a bunch of stuff demanding my time, attention and energy. Last weekend I ignored a scratchy throat and kept with my promise to meet the girls in New Orleans for an impromptu dinner and night on the town. Mind you I’d just gotten over what I thought was a cold, one that kept me too icky to even kiss the squeeze I was under at the time of that visit. Thinking this was not too crazy wouldn’t have been so far fetched – thought maybe I’d aggravated allergies. Wrizzong.

By the time I’d gotten on the plane, met up with the girls, hit dinner and the streets my throat was on FIRE. I even tried one of those big green hurricane grenade slushy things but by the time I got back to the hotel I was drunk AND icky. I had to go to sleep a few hours earlier than the crew – who have since coined me the snooze due to my lame bailout and falling asleep in my clothes.

The next morning I got up, out and on the first flight back to Atlanta taking the first appointment my doc could give me on Monday. Work was so busy that I had to do it from home in between my doctor’s visit even though I felt like hell. I was on the brink of a new project, and stuck with the task of parenthood in spite of. Makes you wonder how much time I really did make for rest. I had no choice and no help so as you guessed it, had to keep it moving.

The Monday doc visit said that I had a sinus germ so I figured, ok, cool. She even said I could go back to work. By the morning I was still feeling illish but went in anyway since I was supposedly not contagious. Ran my routine the entire week only to find out yesterday that I’d had strep throat all along. Part of me was relieved because I knew what I had wasn’t just a sinus yuk and my suspicions had been confirmed. Luckily I’d started antibiotics on Monday.

The way this whole illness thing lingered on and turned to something else was a clear reminder that I’m not superwoman and I really gotta chill. I keep forgetting that I’m not 20 something and jumping from the gym to the car with sweat on my brow in the bit cold probably won’t work too well anymore…among other things.

This weekend I’m still, but just for a minute and to fully mend. I’ll be back 100 soon.

-black girl.

NOTORIOUS Film: BIG Shoes to Fill?
January 9, 2009, 4:42 pm
Filed under: Flicks, MUSIC | Tags: , ,

I’m pretty excited about this movie and hate that I missed the screening for getting my dates mixed up :-(. I’ve purposely not checked reviews because I want to see for myself since every lead character and the Director have some pretty ‘Big’ shoes to fill.

I’m looking forward to the storyline as well hoping that the writers did this screenplay justice. If they leave out one HOT B.I.G. track or an element critical in telling his story they get an automatic F from Black Girl.

Film premiers Jan. 16, 2009 so for those of that have already seen it save your comments for after the drop! (or you’ll be as bad as my mom giving away Seven Pounds for hounding me about my texting while driving habits, lol.)

-black girl.