Black Girl In The City.

February 8, 2010, 11:11 am
Filed under: Chapter Next | Tags: , , ,

Kate Frankfurt

Music:  Yo Gotti // Women Lie, Men Lie

I miss you guys…but ya know how it goes, lol.  I had to take another impromptu hiatus to gather my things and move on up a notch.  Finally settled in, my cutsie home office is done.  I’m excited.  The new business venture I mentioned is moving in fast forward motion, to the point where I’m going to have to start considering the appropriate attire to wear when attending client meetings.  Dress for the occasion I guess.   At any rate, I just wanted to reach out to  let you know that I’m still here…building…loving best I can.  And  FINALLY I have my special place to write so expect to hear from me soon.  In the meantime, be easy.

Ps. This song has nothing to do with the post.  I just think it’s dope.

-black girl.



Kevin Millet

Music: Rising Up // The Roots

Happy New Year to ya! Hopefully your evening and day were spent exactly as you saw fit. As for myself, I partied with some friends at the Ritz and brought in the year surrounded by all of the very people that I will continue to remain connected to in the new decade. Aside from the partying, I also launched a new business and spent most of my new year’s day tarrying over things to do, people to get on the phone with and ish like that. But in the midst of my busy state I thought about you and this blog and wanted to share some words for your 2010.

You know I’m a list girl, lol. And in the midst of my planning and to do’s I began thinking about all of the lessons I’d learned this year. There are so many, but for the sake of brevity I’ll give you my absolute top five. Hopefully you can take something away for yourself as well.

…in no particular order

1. Master the art of doing more with less. I lost a lot this year, only to gain more and greater in the end. This lesson was necessary for me because during those times of loss and shortage I found myself devising new and creative ways to do more with the what I had. And ironically I came up with ways to obtain and build more with what I had, which is crazy to me, lol. Learning to live and enjoy life on the bare minimal is a character builder. A skill builder too, but when you mentally master of the art of doing more with less, you’ll have the skill and know how to manage and keep the excess that is destined to come your way. It’s all apart of the process.

2. Understand the value in every relationship. I’ve always been guilty of hanging on to people or connecting with folks that may not necessarily have my well being as a priority in their minds. This year I really learned to understand the value in every relationship and connection in my life. Value would be defined as anything “good” that happens as a result of the connection, even if you are not the direct recipient. When I began to look at the people around me in this light, I shed a lot of dead weight and ended my 2009 with a close group of valuable relationships that I will continue to build and grow in the years ahead. Contrarily speaking, if you cannot see the value in the connection whatsoever, let. it. go.

3. When in doubt, build, build, and build some more. I can’t tell you how many times I second-guessed and questioned my path throughout the year. I was on something new and treading unfamiliar territory, so I was unsure of what to except along the way. And I admit I was a little scramble headed trying to figure I all out! Lol. But the one thing that I continued to do was build even when I didn’t know much else at the time. I’m not saying build something on shaky ground, I’m saying that when you are in doubt, build on what you know because chances are you know it for a reason! Build and don’t stop, the rest will take shape. I am a living witness to that.

4. Don’t think big, think broad. I’d like to think of big as anything larger than what it is compared to. Usually taller, maybe wider, right? We really can’t pinpoint it we just know its bigger than something else. But, just because something is big doesn’t mean that we can see it in its entirety. What we’re thinking about may be too far over our heads to wholly understand, or there may be something on the other side of that big that we may not necessarily want to fool with. But when I think of something broad, I think of it as being long range, wide, but at eye level so that you can see a lot more with the basic turn of your head. Can’t see that far in the distance? Get some glasses, some knowledge. It just seems smarter to think broad in order to be big. Thinking big is a little less specific, but thinking broad gives us a long-range front, rear and side-to-side view of our lives. It also takes a lot more skill and strategy than thinking big, which is easy. I’ll definitely be focusing on the broader picture in 2010.

5. Love. I know its something so simple but I learned a lot about love this year. Not the boo’d up R-Kelly kinda love, but the love that you share with your family and friends and carries a ,”No matter what, now matter how” disclaimer. As in no matter what happens, no matter what you do, that real kind of love will be there when you need it most. If you don’t have access to that kind of love and you are not able to offer it yourself, work on that ASAP. Get past your issues, amend the mistakes and have your sorries because in the end its that real kind of the love that will get you through the most challenging times

-black girl.

A Good Thing.
December 20, 2009, 1:43 pm
Filed under: Chapter Next, Reflections of a Black Girl

Adrian Riemann

Music: Going On // Gnarles Barkley

I needed some time to think and get my shit together. To really decide what I am doing and how it compliments the bigger picture. Even now I’m sitting here at the computer wondering whether or not to push things harder than I have, or to stay on the same course and speed throughout the next year. I’m afraid the latter isn’t in my blood. Something that became painfully evident this year when I made the ultimate decision to go back to school to learn the mechanics behind my craft. I don’t think I’ve ever worked this hard toward something to be honest with you. For the majority of my life ish came easy. I always seemed to get by and attain what I wanted without much effort, like I had a personal Angel making moves on my behalf or something. So you could imagine the tantrums and fits I threw this year for pushing myself to levels I hadn’t danced on before. One of my homies said it best though. “This is a good thing because you’re building resilience, strength, discipline…you think things are hard but they are not. You good.” I concurred without mentioning that I’d been witnessing the cloud of fear dissipating before my eyes for months now. Proof that what he was saying was indeed correct.

As the cloud continued to dwindle to nothing I began to see and better understand the ultimate design and purpose for my life. And the more I see, the harder I rock. I said that 2008 was a year of change and it became so, and I said that 2009 would be our year to build, work and prepare. Those of you that ride strong with me are in some form or fashion building up yourselves. Which means that 2010 will usher in a year of heightened execution for you and I. All that we’ve practiced and perhaps even learned the hard way will come into play. Everything that we’ve worked on and prepared ourselves for will be put on the playing field and against the opposing side. Will you score? Yes, because we have spent time building as we should. I personally did a lot of cleaning out, cleaning up and moving on to make room for an even more victorious year that’s almost here…and that’s definitely a good thing.

-black girl.

…there she goes!
December 12, 2009, 10:14 pm
Filed under: Chapter Next, Raise Your Stock | Tags: , , , , ,

Kode Logic

Music: Fed Up // DJ Khaled ft. Usher, Jeezy, Rick Ross, Drake.

Wow. Just when you think things are coming to a pause, suddenly you are thrust into the next phase of your game. I don’t think the Universe cares if we’re ready or not. We just kinda have to learn and do as we go along until we get it right for the next phase.   Anyway, I’m excited.   Motivated.   Ready. But more importantly, as you can probably tell, I’m not talking much.    Just re-arranging my life in a big way.   I have a reaaaaallly good feeling about 2010!   Bear with me if you will.

ps. Stay progressive…now is not the time to give up.

-black girl.

November 3, 2009, 1:16 pm
Filed under: Chapter Next, Legitimate Gripes


Music:  Girlicious // Liar, Liar

Time and time again, I am reminded why I should let certain people go whom I’ve thought to call ‘friend’. Then again, I am almost convinced that this may be one of my life-long karmic lessons, that you can’t call everyone friend regardless of how long the two of you have known each other. At least you can expect your enemies to tell you the truth when asked!

And ninjas lie like second nature even when they don’t have a reason to. To be honest, I thought he and I were past that…but how can you expect me to receive you differently when you keep bringing the same ish to the table? Like, really?

A brief time line:

I offer to take him out for his birthday.

He says, “Awe, Mom has a surprise party planned that I’m not supposed to know is a surprise.”

“Cool,” I say thinking that the offer was more so a cordial gesture to a friend of 16 plus years, and I really wanted to see “Paranormal Activity” anyway.

Low and behold the liar is spotted on a date…at the same movie, lolol.

Wow, really?

I could have cared less about the date, were are just friends…so why not say, “Oh, already got plans.” Gratuitous lies are insane to me!

That shyt is really baffling but suppose I can’t get mad when things are revealed as I’ve asked. But still, WHY? LIE? when you have no reason to? I realize that I have a bad habit of holding on to things or people for the sake of holding on to time and wanting to forgive, but taking people at face value is probably what I should be doing more of. So…it’s probably time to grow up and hand certain individuals the pink slip since its evident that they can’t be trusted. But really though, WTF? Someone please help me understand why men lie for no reason whatsoever. And before you go there, yes, women lie too…numbers don’t and all of that. But the topic here is men. Why do you lie? Is it fear? Insecurities? Certainly you can’t be overly concerned with the other person’s feelings because if that’s the case you wouldn’t do it to begin with. To be honest I find it offensive, disrespectful…like as women we are too weak to handle an insignificant truth. And if that is part of the reason let me be the first to tell you, “BULLSHYT.”

-black girl.

…bye bye summer.
September 14, 2009, 3:25 am
Filed under: Chapter Next, Reflections of a Black Girl

DSC00135My very last serene view of yet another summer.

Music: August Day Song // Bebel Gilberto

I always laugh with my friends about the irony of life. In how it so easy to live as if things will never change, and that everything you see, do and hear will be the same as you see, hear and do even a week from now. We all assume it to be dangerously so, and in turn we subject ourselves to the harsh blows that life is notorious for throwing. To no fault of our own because it’s just how some folks live. But if only more of us could learn the importance of living for each individual day, loving and taking care of everything in it with sincerity and intent…with purpose in the moment, I think one’s quality of life would be that much more enjoyable without any external changes needed. Going through the motions and expecting that the future will be exactly as we planned is a risky habit that I admit to having succumb to at times. But in all of it I’ve learned an important fact: we all deserve to live and live well. And that includes cherishing the present day.

Waving goodbye to the end of summer while wading in the warm waters of the Mexican Gulf gave me exactly what I needed. An opportunity to come clean with myself, all the shit that had happened over the past few months, and to really wrap my mind around some important points. Revise my values. Reorganize my principals, priorities and beliefs. To wash away the bad and keep the good. I can’t say I did much writing while there, but the time was well spent doing all that I needed to do to usher out the summer and get on with a day that’s new. Besides, I had to get myself back to this here city to get on with my get on. Now more then ever there’s mad work to do

Live vivaciously.

-black girl.

the power of perspective.
September 4, 2009, 2:28 am
Filed under: Chapter Next, Writer's Log


Music: Jay-Z // History

Things are finally somewhat back to  normal.   I say somewhat because so much has changed within my life and within me.   The world just looks different if that makes any kind of sense at all.    Boy I tell you.  There is so much power in perspective, and I love how life’s lessons have a way of showing up in the most peculiar and unexpected places just so that we may know how to look at things a bit differently.

-black girl.